Hiei's Hypnosis
by Kaden Amano
Summary: The title speaks for itself. Hiei gets hypnotized by Yusuke one day and everyone decides to have some fun with him. CH. 5 IS HERE AT LAST! Kurama plots his revenge...is he all 'there' anymore? O.o; It's the incredible insane fox!
1. Hiei Gets Hypnotized

**HIEI'S HYPNOSIS @.@**  
_Chapter Uno: Hiei Gets Hypnotized_   
  
. . .  
  
_AN: This idea came from all the times my friends hypnotized each other. I was thinking about that and thought of what would happen if any of the Yu-Yu people were hypnotized...hehehe…well let's see what happens, shall we? ^_^_  
  
. . .  
  
Yusuke, Kuwabara, Hiei, Kurama, Kayko, Botan, and Yukina were all gathered together at Yusuke's house on evening. Who cares how they got there, they were there. Yusuke's mother was out at another party, probably getting smashed again.  
  
Anyway, the seven were starting to run out of things to do. They had done just about everything except spin the bottle, which Hiei could not be convinced to play. Yusuke had taken Kayko's necklace from her, even though he knew what the consequence would be, and was running around the room with it while she chased him.   
  
Suddenly Yusuke stopped in front of Hiei and began swinging the necklace in front of him. "You are getting very sleepy," he said, as he continued to swing the necklace back and forth.  
  
  
  
"What are trying to do?" Hiei asked him. "You can't possibly believe that something like that is going to work on me."  
  
Yusuke ignored him. "You are getting even more tired by the second. Your eyes feel so heavy, and you just want to close them. When I count to three, you're going to fall into a deep, restful sleep. One..."  
  
"This will never work," Hiei told him.  
  
"Two..."  
  
"Hn."  
  
"Three!" Suddenly Hiei fell forward. "Whoa!" Yusuke caught him before he hit the floor and laid him onto the couch. He was fast asleep.  
  
"Yusuke, what have you done?" Kayko asked, so shocked that she forgot all about her kidnapped necklace.  
  
Yusuke stared at Hiei, amazed. "I didn't think it would work."  
  
"Is he okay?" Kuwabara asked.  
  
"He's fine, Kuwabara, he's just under hypnosis," Kurama said. "You should probably bring him out of it, Yusuke. He's going to be very angry when he wakes up."  
  
"Oh, alright. Umm, Hiei when I snap my fingers you're going to--"  
  
"Wait, not yet!" Kuwabara cut in. "Come on Urameshi, let's have some fun with him before you wake him up."  
  
Yusuke stared at Kuwabara. "He's going to kill us all, you know."  
  
"Not if you make him forget everything that happens!" Kuwabara said. "You can do that, I've seen it on television."  
  
"Well...what the heck, it IS pretty tempting," Yusuke agreed with a shrug of his shoulders. "Somebody better get this on film..."  
  
"On it, Yusuke," Botan said from behind a video camera.  
  
"What should I make him do first?" Yusuke wondered. Then an evil grin formed on his face. "I know... Hiei, when I snap my fingers you're going to wake up, and when you wake up you're going to be madly in love with Kuwabara." He snapped his fingers.  
  
"What??" Kuwabara cried out in shock.  
  
Hiei sat up on the couch. "What?" He looked down and realized that he wasn't where he had been a few minutes ago. Looking very confused, he suddenly glanced up at the group looking down at him. Pausing for a minute, he seemed to be staring at Kuwabara.  
  
"What's up, Hiei?" Yusuke asked him.   
  
"Hn," Hiei answered. "Kuwabara, can I speak to you in another room?"  
  
"Huh?" Kuwabara looked frightened.   
  
Yusuke gave him a shove. "Go on, man. You two can talk in the kitchen," he said to Hiei with a wink. Hiei just gave him a strange look and got up. He went into the kitchen and Yusuke pushed Kuwabara in after him.  
  
They waited for a few minutes, listening at the doorway but hearing nothing. Suddenly Kuwabara came flying out of the kitchen, white as a ghost and screaming bloody murder. Yusuke ran after him and caught him by the arm.  
  
"What happened, Kuwabara?" He asked.  
  
Kuwabara turned to Yusuke, a look of sheer terror on his face. "He--he tried to kiss me!"  
  
"What?" Yusuke began to laugh uncontrollably. "Are you serious?"  
  
"It's not funny, Urameshi!" Kuwabara yelled. "Make him stop being in love with me!"  
  
"Oh, fine. Hiei!" Yusuke called. Hiei slunk into the room, looking a little disappointed.  
  
"What do you want?"  
  
"Just take a seat on the couch, will you?"  
  
Hiei glared at him, but sat down anyway. Yusuke snapped his fingers and Hiei fell into a deep sleep again.  
  
"Okay Hiei, when you wake up this time you won't be in love with Kuwabara, but you're going to suddenly realize that you're completely naked. Worst of all, when you try to get up you won't be able to because you'll be stuck to the couch." Yusuke snapped his fingers and Hiei woke up again.   
  
From behind the camera, Botan giggled. Thinking he felt a breeze, Hiei looked down at himself and suddenly crossed his legs.  
  
"What have you done?" He glared at the rest of the group.  
  
"What are you talking about, Hiei?" Kurama asked him, starting to get into the hypnosis fun. "What's wrong?"  
  
"Can't you see?" He scowled.  
  
"No," Yusuke answered. "Are you okay?"  
  
"Of course not!" Hiei snapped. "I want to know which one of you fools took my clothes!"  
  
"What do you mean, Hiei? You're wearing your clothes," Kurama informed him, holding back a laugh.  
  
"How stupid do you think I am?" Hiei snarled. He looked at them, his eyes shifting from person to person. "Who did it?"  
  
"Hiei, are you sure you're alright?" Kuwabara asked him.  
  
Hiei grabbed one of the couch pillows, covered himself with it and tried to stand up. "I'll be all right when I slice you into particles of dust!" He found that he couldn't stand up and this pissed him off even more. "What the hell is going on?!"  
  
Yusuke was laughing so hard he was crying. "Okay, I think that's enough. The veins on his forehead are going to pop if he gets any angrier." He snapped his fingers, and Hiei instantly fell back onto the couch, the pillow still covering his crotch.  
  
"What are you going to do next?" Kurama wondered.  
  
"I've got an idea!" Kurama leaned over and whispered something into Yusuke's ear that made him laugh.  
  
"That 's perfect!" He laughed. "Okay Hiei, when you wake up you won't be naked anymore. But you ARE going to feel like singing, and Kurama tells me that there's only one song you know..." He snapped his fingers and Hiei woke up once again.  
  
Hiei saw the pillow still sitting on his crotch and tossed it away, confused. Looking around, he grabbed remote control and stood up.  
  
"What are you gonnna do, Hiei?" Kuwabara asked him.  
  
Hiei just looked at him. "You'll see." Suddenly he jumped onto the couch, and, holding the remote like a microphone, began to sing: "Love to see you whip it, sure could treat you right. Gimme just a minute of your time tonight. We both are here to have some fun. Let it whip."   
  
He began to dance around on the couch and began the second verse: "I know you're into groovin', love your body language. Baby let me know, ya got me sort of anxious. We both are here to have some fun. Let it whip. Whip it baby, whip it right. Whip it baby, whip it all night. Let it whip..." He continued to sing until he had finished the song and everyone watching him was rolling with laughter.  
  
"Okay, okay," Yusuke regained control of himself enough to snap his fingers. Hiei fell down onto the couch in a deep sleep again.  
  
The other six continued to laugh for about five minutes afterwards until Kuwabara was struck with an idea.  
  
"Hey Urameshi, I know what you could do to him next!" He whispered something in Yusuke's ear, and Yusuke snickered.  
  
"Alright, Kuwabara, but that's the last one. If Hiei DOES remember any of this I don't want to get any more beatings then necessary. Okay Hiei, when you wake up this time you won't feel like singing anymore. Instead, you're going to think that you're a girl whose boyfriend just broke up with her." Yusuke snapped his fingers and Hiei instantly sat up, wide awake.  
  
Seeing Hiei's troubled expression, Kurama sat down next to him. "Are you all right, Hiei?"  
  
"No." Hiei shook his head.  
  
"What's the matter?" Kurama asked him.  
  
"It's nothing," Hiei replied.  
  
"It's all right, you can tell me," Kurama insisted.  
  
"Well..." Suddenly Hiei burst into tears. "It's my boyfriend, he just broke up with me!" He wailed. "I don't know why, I don't understand it! Everything was going so well! He didn't even give me a reason! I hate men!" Sobbing, Hiei turned to cry in Kurama's arms.  
  
"Er--there, there," said Kurama as he awkwardly patted Hiei's back. The others ewere laughing uncontrollably, clutching their sides as tears rolled down their cheeks.  
  
"This is priceless!" Yusuke managed to cry out. The others just nodded in agreement; they couldn't speak because they were laughing too hard.  
  
Ten minutes later they were still laughing, Hiei was still crying, and Kurama was still awkwardly trying to provide some sort of comfort. Finally Yusuke decided that it would be in his best interest to discontinue this little session of hypnosis, and so he snapped his fingers for the last time, causing Hiei to slump forward onto Kurama.  
  
"Okay Hiei, when you wake up you won't be a girl and your boyfriend won't break up with you. Everything is going to be normal, except you won't remember anything that happened during the time you were hypnotized," Yusuke said. "...Oh yeah, and after you wake up you won't go back to sleep if I snap my fingers again. On the count of three you're gonna wake up. One...two...three."  
  
Hiei's eyes opened and suddenly he realized that he was leaning on Kurama. He jumped backwards, looking more confused than any of them had ever seen him. "What just happened?" He glared at them in search of answers, but all he got was laughter. "What are you fools laughing about?" He saw Botan remove a tape from the video camera. "What's that?"  
  
"Oh, nothing," Botan answered sweetly. "Just a tape of...um...my sister's wedding."  
  
"Hn," Hiei remarked. "Something's going on, and I'm going to find out. When I do, somebody is going to get hurt." With that, he stood up and jumped out the window.  
  
"Whew," Yusuke sighed. "That was a close one. Hey Botan, I didn't know your sister got married."  
  
Botan gave him a smile. "I don't even have a sister, Yusuke," she said. "But I'd better hide this tape somewhere, because if he finds it then he'll kill us."  
  
"Quite literally, I'm afraid," Kurama added.  
  
"Then let's hope he never sees it," Kuwabara said. After a minute of silence, they all began to laugh again.  
  
. . .  
  
_AN: Okay just a few things people should know before I get flamed by a bunch of Hiei-crazed fangirls (or guys). Now, I like Hiei as much as the next person. He's my favorite Yu-Yu Hakusho character, but all that aside, he is just SO easy to pick on. XP_


	2. Hiei Finds Out

**HIEI'S HYPNOSIS @.@ **

_Chapter Deux: Hiei's Revenge_   
  
. . .  
  
_AN: Well I didn't think I would be doing a second part to this, but I got so many requests for a sequel that I decided I'd do one, so thanks to everyone for the encouragement, I'm so happy you liked my fic so much! ^_^  
_  
. . .  
  
Hiei jumped from tree to tree, rooftop to rooftop, keeping a close eye on Yusuke's home. He knew they were keeping something from him--the only question was, what? He reached the end of the block and turned around, heading back towards the building Yusuke lived in. It pissed him off that there was something they weren't telling him.  
  
He paused on the top of a chimney as he watched Botan, Kurama, and Kuwabara walk by. Botan was carrying the same tape that she had taken out of the video camera...that damn tape. There was something on that tape that none of them wanted him to see, he knew it. He certainly was no idiot--what kind of a fool did they take him for? Somehow he just had to get that tape from Botan...Kuwabara was just an incompetent half-wit; he would be easy to get rid of, and an empty threat would be enough to scare the woman into handing the tape over. But Kurama was a completely different story...  
  
Deciding to take his chances anyway, Hiei jumped off the chimney, landing neatly on his feet right in front of the three--two of whom were taken by surprise.  
  
"Oh hey Shorty, nice day, heh-heh..." Kuwabara sounded a little nervous...perfect. Hiei couldn't help but let a slight smirk cross his face. He glared at the three of them for a few seconds before pointing in a random direction behind them.  
  
"Look, a distraction," he said calmly. Caught off gaurd, they all turned to look in the direction he was pointing. When they did, Hiei quickly snatched the tape from Botan and jumped back into the trees with a speed that only he posessed.  
  
A split second too late (for that was all it took for Hiei to confiscate the tape and get away), Kurama was the first to realize they'd been tricked. It had caught him by surprise that Hiei would do something like that, so he couldn't help but look. Botan was next to realize this and she was also quick to discover what was missing.  
  
"Oh, no!" She looked around desperately to make sure she hadn't just dropped the tape even though she knew full well what had happened. "The tape, it's gone!"  
  
"This can't be good," Kurama remarked. "I can't say I wasn't expecting this, though."  
  
  
  
"Oh, he's going to kill us when he watches that tape!" Botan moaned. She looked at Kurama hopefully. "Wait--he doesn't have a VCR, does he?"  
  
"No," Kurama answered. "But that isn't going to stop him."  
  
"Hey guys," came Kuwabara's voice from behind them, "I can't see the distraction, where is it?"  
  
. . .  
  
The door to Koenma's office opened and Hiei stepped inside. Koenma peered up at him over the many stacks of paperwork he had been neglecting lately.  
  
"Hiei," he said, surprised. "What brings you here?"  
  
"Hn. I need to use your VCR," he replied shortly.  
  


"My VCR? Now why would you want to use that?" Koenma appeared to be quite confused. Hiei didn't seem like the kind of guy who liked to kick back and watch movies.  
  


"What does anyone use a VCR for, I need to watch something."  
  


"...Well...all right. But first, tell me--what on earth is it that you want to watch?"

Hiei glared at him before answering, "Yusuke, Kurama and those other fools are hiding something from me and I know that whatever it is, it's on this tape."  
  


"Ooh, okay, why didn't you say that in the first place? Let's see it, Hiei, put the tape in! OGRE! BRING ME SOME POPCORN, CHOP-CHOP!"  
  


"Yes, Koenma sir!" Came the voice of the blue ogre from another room. Hiei put the tape in, wishing Koenma would leave him to watch it alone but realizing it wasn't going to happen, and Koenma pressed play

The very first thing they saw was Hiei zonked out on the couch and everyone else cracking up...and Kuwabara was saying something... 'Come on, Urameshi, let's have some fun with him before you wake him up!' Hiei scowled at the television screen as Yusuke agreed after a moment's hesitation. From then on, Hiei's scowl continued to deepen with every passing minute of the tape. It was bad enough to have tried to kiss Kuwabara, but singing and DANCING?   
  


Absolutely humiliating! And the fact that it had been Kurama's idea to make him sing only made matters worse. But then...then he saw the part where Kuwabara had the idea to make him think he had a boyfriend who broke up with him... Hiei didn't even get to the part where he had burst into tears (which may have been a very good thing). The minute he heard Kurama ask what was wrong, he had thrown his sword at the screen, smashing the glass and destroying it.  
  
            Koenma's fits of laughter were cut short as he heard the destruction of his beloved television. "HIEI!" He shouted. "That was brand new!"  
  
            But Hiei wasn't paying him the slightest bit of attention--instead, he ripped the tape out of the VCR (breaking that as well), snapped it in half, threw it onto the ground, spat on it, crushed it with his foot, set it on fire, and blew it into oblivion with his Sword of the Darkness Flame attack.  
  
_            'How dare they!'_ He thought savagely to himself_. 'How dare they make a mockery of me! I'll kill them; I'll kill them all, and I'll do it slowly and painfully!'_ He stood over what was left of the tape--a burn mark on the floor--and thought of what he would do to them when he got his hands on them. Teeth and fists clenched, hatred burning in his eyes, he felt that simply ending their lives would not be nearly enough to satisfy him.  
  
            Sensing that the situation was about to go way beyond control, Koenma decided that he should think of a solution before Hiei went out on a killing spree.  
  
            "Now, Hiei, don't get any crazy ideas!" He warned. "I'm sure there's a way to get even without hurting anybody," he added. "In fact, I'd be happy to help you do it just as long as you promise not to kill anyone...Hiei...?"  
  
            Hiei glared at him, still royally pissed off but not about to lose his cool just yet. He rather enjoyed the freedom he had, and wasn't about to jeopardize it by going berserk and slaughtering a few certain people. He actually began to think that maybe there WAS a way to get even without killing anybody...  
  
. . .  
  
_AN: To be continued!_


	3. Hiei's Revenge

**HIEI'S HYPNOSIS @_@**   
_Chapter Three: Hiei's REvEnGe_   
  
. . .  
The Next Day:  
. . .  
  
  
  
"Yusuke!" Three loud knocks on the door followed the call.  
  
Yusuke rolled over in his bed, fully aware that somebody was at the door, but too tired to care. "Go away!"  
  
"Yusuke, open up! This is important!" Came a familiar voice.  
  
Yusuke reluctantly got up and went to answer the door. "It better be good," he said to Botan when he saw her standing at the door.  
  
"Koenma wants to see you," she explained. "I'm sure there's a very good reason."  
  
"All right, fine. Just let me get dressed, okay?"  
  
Less than a half hour later, Yusuke, Kuwabara, Botan, and Kurama were all gathered at Koenma's desk. Hiei was nowhere in sight.  
  
"Do you think he's still mad about the tape thing?" Kuwabara wondered.  
  
"He's probably plotting to kill us this very minute," Yusuke answered calmly, which made Kuwabara even more nervous.  
  
"Don't say that, Urameshi, he--he wouldn't! ...Would he?" He turned with a questioning glance to Kurama.  
  
"Hard to say," he replied. They were interrupted by Koenma clearing his throat loudly.  
  
"I'm assuming none of you know why you're here, correct?" He asked. All nodded. "Now I'm going to ask you to have a seat on that couch over there, because there's something you all need to watch."  
  
"...Okay." Everyone sat down on the couch, which had been placed in front of Koenma's replacement television.  
  
"Mind telling us what we're watching?" Yusuke asked.  
  
"It's...your new mission," Koenma answered, and Yusuke could swear he saw him wink at the doorway. Without another word, Koenma held up the remote control and pushed the play button. Immediately, the four began seeing a black and white swirling image on the screen, and soon they found that they could not tear their eyes away from it. Koenma then took over, telling them that when he snapped his fingers, they would all fall into a deep, deep sleep and would wake up only when he snapped his fingers again. Once they were all asleep, Koenma turned to the doorway.  
  
"Come on in, Hiei, they're all asleep!"  
  
Hiei entered the room, looking very pleased upon seeing his comrades knocked out on the couch. The blue ogre was setting up a video camera in the corner of the room.  
  
"So do you know what you want to do to them?" Koenma asked.  
  
Hiei pulled out a thick notebook, smirking. "I have a few ideas." Koenma took the notebook and flipped through it.  
  
"A FEW? Every page is full, Hiei, you call that a few?" He shook his head. "Sheesh, we don't have time to do every one of them."  
  
"I'm aware of that," Hiei said. "I've picked out all my favorites." He reached into his pocket and pulled out a crumpled piece of paper, handing it to Koenma.  
  
Koenma began reading them and started laughing out loud. "These are all very good, Hiei. ...Oh, but we'll have to leave out slitting the wrists, that one could get really messy." Hiei looked a little disappointed, but said nothing. "So who's going to be the first victim?"  
  
            "I was thinking we could start with Kurama," he said. "Have him do number five on that list."  
  
"Alright," Koenma said with a laugh. "This oughta be good... Okay, Kurama. When I snap my fingers, you're going to wake up and be furious at what we've done to you, but when you try to speak everything you say is going to come out in gangsta talk. Oh, and you won't be able to get off the couch or use any of your attacks," he added. "Just a precaution," he told Hiei. Koenma snapped his fingers, and a second later Kurama began to awaken.  
  
It only took him a second to realize what was going on. He opened his mouth to say what would have been "What have you done to me?" but instead it came out "Whatchoo do, muthafucka?" He immediately clamped a hand over his mouth.  
  
"Why don't you tell us what's wrong, Kurama?" Hiei teased him, clearly enjoying it.  
  
"The fuck you do to me, Hiei? The fuck you do? I'ma go old schoo' on yo' punk ass, muthafucka, I'ma go old schoo'!"  
  
Hiei began to laugh his evil laugh, you know the one. "Just try it, I dare you!"  
  
Kurama struggled to get off the couch. "The fuck..." He realized he couldn't move, so he tried to use one of his attacks. "Rose Fuckin' Whip!" But nothing happened. Meanwhile, Hiei was laughing so hard he could barely breathe and Koenma was in hysterics.   
  
"I GONNA BUST A CAP IN YO ASS, FOO'!" Kurama shouted at them.  
  
Koenma regained his composure enough to read the next thing off the list: "Alright. Now Kuwabara, when you wake up everything is going to be normal, except you're going to have a massive migraine and when you put your hands on your head, you'll find that you won't be able to remove them. When I snap my fingers you'll wake up." Koenma snapped his fingers, and Kuwabara sat up, groggily.  
  
"What...happened...?" He asked, confused. "I have this really bad headache..." He placed a hand on his forehead, to massage his throbbing head. But something was wrong... Kuwabara tried to moved his hand and found that he couldn't. "What the--" He jerked his hand, causing his head to be yanked to the side. This made his headache worse. "Ow!" He instictively put his other hand to the opposite side of his head. Bad idea. "WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON!" He screamed as he pulled both arms in different directions, causing his head to jerk back and forth. "WHY CAN'T I TAKE MY HANDS OFF MY HEAD??"  
  
Koenma was in hysterics yet again, and Hiei was smirking at Kuwabara as he proceeded to make an idiot of himself.   
  
"Let me see that list," Hiei said, grabbing it from the teary-eyed toddler. "Hn. Who deserves ultimate torture next?" His eyes immediately fell upon the sleeping Spirit Detective. Hiei grinned wickedly. "Yusuke. Now when I count to three, you're going to wake up, and at first everything is going to seem normal... Then you're going to notice that your seat is getting hotter and hotter with every passing second. You will not be able to get off the couch, either. One...two...three."  
  
Yusuke opened his eyes. "What the...? Did I fall asleep? Was Koenma's movie THAT boring?" He looked at Hiei, who was giving him an evil grin, and then to Kuwabara, who was clutching his head and swinging his upper body around like he'd gone mad. Meanwhile, Kurama was also acting strange, yelling the word "muthafucka" in every other sentence and threatening to go "old school" on Hiei's "punk ass." Koenma was rolling around on the floor, laughing insanely.  
  
"Hiei," Yusuke began, but suddenly stopped. "What the hell..." He looked down at his seat.  
  
"What's the matter, Spirit Detective?" Hiei sneered.  
  
"Oh...um, nothing," Yusuke shrugged it off. Seconds later, though, he began to freak out. "Okay, I KNOW something is wrong here! This couch is really hot! ...What's going on? ...Ouch, that kind of hurts... Ow! ...OW! ...OH MY FREAKING GOD, MY ASS IS FRICKING BURNING!" He screamed. Hiei began to laugh. "IT'S NOT FUNNY HIEI YOU ASSHOLE!" Yusuke yelled at the fire demon. He tried desperately to get off the couch. "I can't move? OH PERFECT!" He kept struggling as the temperature increased on his rear. "THIS ISN'T FUNNY ANYMORE! I'M GOING TO KILL YOU HIEI YOU BASTARD!"   
  
Hiei smirked again. "Next victim..." His eyes fell upon Botan, the only one who was still asleep. "I've got a perfect one for the woman," he said to himself. "Botan. When you wake up, you're going to suddenly think you've just slept with Koenma...in his toddler form!" Hiei laughed wickedly and almost forgot to wake her up. "When I count to three you're going to wake up. One, two, three."  
  
            Koenma glanced up when he heard his name. "Hiei! That isn't very nice!"

            "Hn. That's why I'm doing it," Hiei shot back.  
  
            "I WAS TALKING ABOUT ME!" He shouted, but then became intrigued as Botan started to wake up. She sat up and stared blankly into space for a minute before things began to register.  
  


            She saw Koenma watching her and then something seemed to click. "...Oh..." She started to shake her head. "No, no, it couldn't be... I didn't...did I?" She glanced up to Koenma for confirmation. After recieving a 'do-it-or-die' glare from Hiei, Koenma sighed heavily and nodded slowly. "Oh no!" Botan cried out. "I--I--how could I?" She buried her face into her hands. "NO! No, no, no, no,no! ...Was I drunk? Have I been drinking? I don't remember what happened earlier today. I remember going into Koenma's office and...OH MY GOSH!!" She shook her head violently in disbelief. "OH THAT IS SO SICK AND WRONG!"  
  


            Koenma gave her an indignant look. "Well!"  
  
            Meanwhile, somebody was in severe pain: "OOOWWWWWW FUCK! MY ASS IS NUMB!" Yusuke shouted. Kuwabara was having an attack in the corner of the room, ramming headfirst into the wall repeatedly. Apparently he was driving himself mad. Either that or it was a foolish attempt at getting his hands to come off his head. Kurama was screaming curses at them all from his place on the couch.  
  


            "I have one more before the finale," Hiei said to Koenma.  
  
            "Shoot," Koenma shrugged. "Long as I get it all on tape!"  
  
            Hiei turned to the others and snapped his fingers. They all instantly stopped doing whatever they were doing and slumped back onto the couch (except Kuwabara, he fell over backwards onto the floor). "Kurama, Yusuke, and Kuwabara. When you wake up, you're all going to feel an incredible urge to go streaking in Tokyo. Kurama will no longer be a gangster. Yusuke, your ass is still going to feel like it's burning. Kuwabara, you're hands will still be glued to your head. On the count of three you'll all wake up. One...two...three."  
  
            Everyone (minus Botan) sat up, looking confused. Yusuke glanced at Kurama.   
  
            "Hey Kurama, you know what? I feel like streaking for some reason..."  
  
            "Really, Yusuke? I was thinking of doing the exact same thing, although I cannot explain why..."  
  
            Kuwabara sat up from the corner. "STREAKING IN TOKYO!" He yelled at the top of his lungs. He quickly removed his every article of clothing [AN: AAAHHHHH! SCARRED FOR LIFE! *covers eyes*] and ran out the door, hands clutching his head again. "LAST ONE THERE IS A WEAK PUNK!" He shouted over his shoulder.  
  
            Kurama and Yusuke exchanged glances. "Let's go," Yusuke said. "My ass is gonna frickin' burn up if I don't try to cool it off!"  
  
            Kurama leapt off the couch and ripped off his clothes. He turned to Yusuke (facing the camera). "Are you coming?"  
  
            "HELL YEAH!" Yusuke responded, and threw off his own clothes. The two of them raced out the door and immediately caught up with Kuwabara. "TOKYO HERE WE COME!" They shouted. Hiei watched them go, laughing evilly at how much they would be humiliated by this later. He was very glad that none of them had thought to do that to HIM.  
  
            Meanwhile, Koenma had turned on his big TV and was watching the three nude detectives as they ran through the city, waving to people who stared at them. They looked like they were having the time of their lives. Suddenly the Channel 38 News helicopter appeared in the corner of the TV screen, apparently filming the three delinquents: one screaming "YOU BETTA RECOGNIZE, FOO'!", one with his hands apparently stuck to his face, and the third one screaming, "IT'S BURNING IT'S BURNING IT'S BURNING!"  
  
            Koenma started to laugh again, and Hiei couldn't help but chuckle [AN: I HATE that word, "chuckle" ugh, it reminds me of something Santa Claus would do].  
  
            "Hiei, how are we going to get them back?" Koenma wondered.  
  
            "Oh, they'll be back," Hiei assured him. Sure enough, about an hour and thirty more News helicopters later, three exhausted young men re-entered Koenma's office. Panting from all that running, they all pulled their clothes back on and sat down onto the couch.  
  
            "Whew!" Yusuke said. "That was fun! We should do it again sometime, huh guys?"  
  
            "My sentiments exactly," Kurama agreed.  
  
            "We were on TV, too!" Kuwabara said excitedly. "Did you hear me yell 'Hi mom!'?"  
  
            Wasting no time, Hiei snapped his fingers and they all fell asleep again. He re-read the long list of ideas, and decided on one that would be perfect for the finale. "Everyone. When you all wake up, you're not going to want to streak anymore, Kuwabara's hands won't be glued to his head, and Yusuke's ass will no longer be burning. Instead, you're going to see a coffin in the corner of this room. You're all going to wonder why it's there and go look inside. When you do, you're going to see a body--mine, to be precise. And then you're all going to see the real me and think I'm a ghost. Understand?" Four heads nodded sleepily in response. "Good. On the count of three you'll all wake up. One...two...three."  
  
            Kurama was the first to sit up. He seemed to notice something in the corner of the room. "What...?"  
  
            Yusuke and Kuwabara woke up next. They saw Kurama looking at an object in the corner. "What are you staring at, Kurama?" They wondered. Then they saw it for themselves. "What the heck?" They all slid off the couch and wandered over to the black coffin, peering inside.  
  
            "Hiei!" Kurama gasped.  
  
            "Sh--shorty?" Stammered Kuwabara. "Wh-what h-happened to you?"  
  
            Botan woke up and went over to see what the commotion was about. "Hey boys, what are you--Oh my gosh, Hiei!" She gasped and her hands went to cover her mouth for some reason [AN: Why do people do that anyway?].  
  
            "...It can't be." Yusuke shook his head sadly.  
  
            "It is," Hiei told them. Four heads jerked around to the spot where Hiei now stood, beside the "coffin".  
  
            "It's Shorty's ghost!" Kuwabara cried out.  
  
            "That's right, you incompetent!" Hiei snarled, doing an excellent acting job (or _was_ he acting…). "I AM a ghost. I'm dead because of you fools!"  
  
            "What?" Kurama was shocked. "But how?"  
  
            "Hn. I found that stupid tape," he said. "I brought it here to watch it. That was the biggest mistake I've ever made..."  
  
            "You mean...?" Yusuke trailed off as Hiei nodded.  
  
            "I died out of shame from watching that tape!" He growled. "You think it's funny being the center of a joke?"  
  
            "Not anymore," Kuwabara whimpered. "Are you mad? Because we're really, really sorry..."  
  
            "What do you think, you fool?!" Hiei snapped.   
  
            "Hiei...if I'd only known..." Yusuke sank to his knees. He buried his face in his hands. "I--I can't believe that because of some stupid joke, you're--" He started to get choked up and couldn't speak anymore. Kurama bowed his head and said nothing, while Kuwabara's shocked expression remained etched onto his face. Botan's face was tear-stained.  
  
            "I swear, I'm never going to do anything like this again!" Kuwabara wailed. "I always made fun of you, Shorty, but I'm gonna miss you!"  
  
            Yusuke's shoulders were shaking and his face was not visible, but he was obviously crying.   
  
            Koenma decided that they'd better stop there before certain lines were crossed. "All right everyone, back to sleep," he said, snapping his fingers as soon as they were all seated on the couch again. "Now when you all wake up, everything is going to be perfectly normal. You're not going to remember anything that happened while you were under hypnosis, and you're just going to wake up thinking that you fell asleep watching another one of my boring movies. One...two...three."  
  
            All four of them slowly sat up groggily.  
  
            "What's up?" Yusuke asked Koenma when he saw him. "I, um, liked your movie."  
  
            "I'm sure you did, Yusuke," Koenma said, and he couldn't help but crack up. Hiei smirked.  
  
            "What's going on?" Kurama wondered as he woke up. Kuwabara and Botan sat up, too.  
  
            "Oh, nothing," Koenma said. "By the way, you can all go home now. I'll call you in a few days, Yusuke."  
  


            "Um...okay." Yusuke shrugged, and they all left.  
  
. . .  
The Very Next Day:  
. . .  
  
            Yusuke was watching television when he heard a knock on his door. Getting up, he muttered, "This better be good," and opened the door. Seeing nobody there, Yusuke was about to close the door when something on the doormat caught his eye. A tape.  
  


            "What's this?" He wondered. He picked it up and decided to go watch it...  
  
. . .  
  
            Kurama was alone in his house when he also heard a loud knock on his front door. He left the kitchen and went to see who had come to visit him. Opening the door, Kurama saw nobody in front of it. Instead there was a tape lying on the doorstep.  
  


            "Hm, what could this be?" He thought out loud. He bent over to pick up the tape, and brought it inside to watch it...  
  
. . .  
  
            "Kuwabara, get the door!" Shizura yelled from in the bathroom. Kuwabara sighed and rolled off his bed. He shuffled over to the door and swung it open.  
  


            "Hello?" There was nobody there. "YOU LITTLE PUNKS, YOU BETTER STOP DOING THAT!" Kuwabara screamed. Those pesky little kids, at it again! He was about to slam the door when he noticed a tape on the ground in front of the door. "What?" He grabbed the tape. "Huh. Wonder what this is?" He went inside, closing the door behind him, thinking that since he had nothing better to do he might as well watch it.  
  
. . .  
  
            Hiei was sitting high in a tree, not far from either of the boys' houses. He had delivered each tape with ease, being careful not to let anyone hear him. Each one of his comrades was now watching the tape. Any moment now...  
  


            Suddenly it happened. Three voices, all at once, one long scream. If you were walking down the street three blocks away, you would have heard, "HIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEIIIII!!!!!!"  
  
            Hiei smirked. Revenge was so sweet.  
  
. . .  
  
_THE END!  
  
AN: The end, yay, and Hiei got awesome revenge! Thanks to the people who gave suggestions and I'm sorry if I didn't use your ideas. If I do another chapter on this, I promise I will, ok? And sorry this chapter took so long, hopefully it was worth the wait... ^_^  
  
CREDITS:  
  
anime-poker-chik -- Uncontrollable urge to go streaking in Tokyo  
  
sea-youkai-Juri -- Kuwabara: glue his hands to his head  
  
Rose Eclipse -- Have Hiei create a mock funeral saying that he died out of shame from the tape  
  
Everything else was thought of by me_.


	4. Filler Chapter, Hiei's Celebration

**HIEI'S HYPNOSIS @_@**

_Chapter Four: Filler Chapter! (Hiei Celebrates)_

. . .

_AN: Well it looks like I had an author's note here, huh? That just was not going to do! And since Fanfiction.net no longer allows you to have an author note as a chapter, I figured I'd better put somefin' here so my precious story doesn't get deleted! So…behold, the night Hiei gets his revenge he decides to have a little celebration… ~_^_

. . .

            Hearing their tortured screams had made it all worthwhile. All the humiliation he'd suffered thanks to those fools, now they knew how it felt! And revenge had never felt better. The speedy Jaganshi was perched in the usual tree—_his_ tree—in the park, reliving that same moment over and over again. He closed his eyes and imagined the mortification that the kitsune, the Spirit Detective, and the oaf would have to experience the minute they set foot outside their houses. He knew that every news station this side of Japan had broadcast the footage of the three streakers in action…he smiled to himself as he pictured the look on Kurama's human mother's face. She would be horrified…Kurama always worked hard to please that ningen onna, and now he had finally done something to bring her disappointment. With Hiei's 'help,' of course.

            A strange new feeling was present inside him that day. Hiei was puzzled by it. What in the Makai could it mean? Was he hungry? …No, it couldn't be that. He had gone through Kurama's refrigerator earlier that morning (before his revenge had taken place) and eaten the last of his Sweet Snow. MmmmMmmMmMMmm, Sweet Snow…Hiei licked his lips absentmindedly as thoughts of the sweet treat filled his head. He would have to get some more of that delicious substance at some point that evening. But who would he get it from? Not Kurama…that fox would no doubt be very upset for days to come, after Hiei had ruined his perfect image. Certainly not Yusuke either…although Hiei suspected that Yusuke didn't mind the streaking quite as much as Kurama did, he probably didn't enjoy having his rear end on fire. This thought made Hiei chuckle softly, remembering how Yusuke was unable to get off the couch when he felt the burning sensation. 

            …

            There was that odd feeling again…what _was_ it? Hiei was confused. He didn't think he was sick. He wasn't tired, either. And for some reason, he didn't feel like his usual cold, bad-tempered self that day. Something odd was afoot! Had somebody cast some weird spell on him? He sat there for a few minutes, trying to identify the feeling he felt. It wasn't like the satisfaction he would ordinarily feel after, say, destroying an enemy of his. Or like the pleasure he got out of insulting his inferiors. No, this was completely different…

            Wait…

            Could it be?

            Hiei shook his head in reply to the question he had asked himself. No, it couldn't. Demons certainly do not experience _that_ kind of feeling. …But it sounded a lot like the very same feeling Kurama had described once. Thinking of Kurama suddenly triggered the memory of the kitsune talking in gangster-slang, and Hiei began to laugh out loud. This outburst caused several humans who were hanging around the park to jump in surprise—they obviously had no idea the tree was occupied by the vertically challenged one. Hiei's laughter eventually subsided, but he continued to wear a large grin on his face (scary when you think about it, ne?). Leaping down from the tree, he figured he would make the most of this moment. It was the day of his revenge after all, why _not _have a bit of fun? A human woman turned up her nose at him as she walked past, and he in turn gave her his most deadly glare…then smirked as she made a hasty departure.

            Oh, to hell with denial. Hiei was happy.

            And now to find himself some sweet snow…recalling a conversation between Yusuke and Kuwabara a while ago about this mysterious place called "store" Hiei decided that would be the best place to begin his search. But where to find one? He traveled down the sidewalk, hands in his cloak pockets, glaring at each human that dared to pass him. As much as he disliked humans, their sugary treats were delicious. Maybe one of _them_ would know where to find Sweet Snow? As a young male human walked by, Hiei reached out quickly and gripped the boy's arm.

            "Where is 'Store'?" He demanded.

            "Huh?" The boy looked confused, and Hiei scowled. Stupid humans! Don't they know anything?

            "I said 'Store', you incompetent! Tell me where it is!" He repeated, quickly growing impatient.

            "Oh!" The boy smiled at him. How disgusting! "There's a store right down the street, over there," he said, pointing to a large brick building not too far away. Satisfied, Hiei released his hold on the boy and in two seconds flat he was standing at the door of the building. There had better be Sweet Snow at this place, or that baka ningen would pay for misleading him! And the place was just crawling with humans…hundreds of them. They would go inside with nothing at all, and then come out of the building holding many paper bags in which he assumed contained what they called 'food' by the smell of it all. Hiei entered the building. At first the doors confused him—they opened on their own! But he made it past them with little difficulty. Nothing was going to stand between Hiei Jaganshi and his Sweet Snow! He strode into the store, giving his infamous death glare to all who crossed his path or dared to look at him cross-eyed. They immediately cleared a path for him, and he was free to search the aisles.

            Where was it? Where the hell was his sweet snow?

            He was beginning to become irritated. These fools, why didn't they put the sweet snow up in the front of the store? Finally, he found it. The frozen food section…and the sweet snow as well! He pulled open the freezer doors and began loading his arms with carton after carton, until he couldn't carry any more of them. Then he turned, letting the door slam shut behind him, and began walking out of the store…however he was met with a slight problem during his departure. Those idiot humans were trying to stop him! They kept saying something about having to 'pay' for the frozen treats…Hiei snarled at them all. Nobody made _him_ pay for anything! Clutching the cartons close to his chest, Hiei gave them all one last smirk and then phased out of the store completely, leaving the humans bewildered and thinking they had seen a ghost.

            Hiei returned to his place in the tree—_his_ tree—and began rapidly consuming the sugary substance, carton after carton. He found that vanilla was his favorite, but most Sweet Snow was absolutely mouth-watering. Except for Black Cherry, which he found rather disgusting but ate it anyway. As the sun set and all the annoying humans began to return to their homes, Hiei polished off the last carton of ice cream and then belched loudly. 

He felt very odd.

            It was like that happy feeling he'd felt earlier, only now it seemed to have multiplied by at least five! He felt rather giddy, to say the least. As he sat in the tree, allowing the ice cream to digest, a large grin spread its way across his face. And for no reason at all! But Hiei wasn't puzzled by it in the least. He didn't have time to be puzzled, for there was much more important matters to investigate—like air! How fascinating! He had never really given the oxygen he breathed a second thought, but now it was the only thing on the planet that seemed to matter. He took large gasping breaths, trying to see if he could taste this air. He couldn't. In fact he couldn't even feel the air when it was supposedly inside his mouth. It felt like nothing at all, just like…he began to laugh…just like air!

            After five minutes, Hiei was still laughing uncontrollably, and suddenly he rolled over and fell off the tree limb he'd been relaxing in. He hit the ground with a _'thud'_ and this only caused him to laugh harder. For some reason it was just so funny! The _'thud'_ noise resounded inside his head and he clutched his sides, writhing on the ground in his insane, sugar-high laughter. Is this what too much sweet snow did to somebody? He stopped laughing abruptly, as if he had never been laughing in the first place, to ponder that question. And so he pondered.

            …Five minutes later and he was still thinking.

            …Ten minutes later and he was still consumed in his thoughts.

            …Fifteen minutes later and still he sat there contemplating the effects of sweet snow on an individuals' psyche.

            …Twenty minutes later he arrived at a conclusion:

            "I am going to need a spork," he stated to himself. Then he rolled over laughing insanely again, forgetting all about trying to figure out why sweet snow made somebody act in such a manner as this. When he finally stopped laughing, he lay there on the grass, twitching and talking to himself.

            "I really like this sweet snow," he said. "It makes me very happy to eat this delicious sweet snow…I love you, Sweet Snow," he told the empty carton that had once contained Vanilla ice cream. "I have something to ask you…" Hiei grunted as he rolled onto his stomach to face the said carton, "Vanilla Sweet Snow, will you marry me?"

            Carton does not respond to Hiei's request.

            But apparently it had consented to the proposal, because a minute later Hiei was sporting a goofy grin that looked positively terrifying on him and hugging the empty carton to his bare chest…for some reason unknown, Hiei had lost his shirt during his insane hyper fits of laughter. "I'm marrying my Sweet Snow," he sang to nobody in particular. He brought his lips to the carton and placed a big wet kiss onto the cardboard exterior. Hiei lay there with his new fiancé for an hour or so before he suddenly sat up straight. His left eyebrow was twitching like mad. He felt it building up inside him, like a volcano about to blow. He couldn't contain it much longer…he needed to release what was trapped inside him, and he needed to do it _now_.

            He jumped to his feet and kicked the carton away as far as he could, and for no particular reason at all. Then he began to jump quickly in place, up and down, up and down, having nowhere else to go. He had to run. RUN! BE FREE! Too much energy…too much, too much…he had to do something, SOMETHING!

            "AHH!" He shouted into the night air, not getting a response and not wanting one. "I have to run!" He said to himself. "Run, run, run, run! RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN!!!!" He screamed at the top of his lungs, and suddenly he broke into a run, speeding circles around the park for hours on end until, when he finally came to a stop, there was a three-foot trench around the park's entire perimeter.

            Now he was utterly exhausted. He had succeeded in burning off all the new energy he'd acquired, and also in running himself ragged. Suddenly he became entirely ashamed of himself. What in the seven hells had possessed him to do any of this? Proposing to a carton! A Sweet Snow carton! How stupid! Hiei felt the heat slowly creeping up to his cheeks. He was just glad that nobody had seen him this way—they would never let him live it down. He made his way over to his tree and hopped up onto one of the highest limbs. He needed to get some rest now, after being up all night on a sugar rush.

            "Hn!" He scowled as he settled into the branches and slowly began to nod off. Never again would he do anything like this, as long as he lived!

. . .

_AN: There you go! ^_^ That's what happens when Hiei gets sugar high… O.o;;; Hey, don't ask me. I don't even know what the hell happened there, and I'm the one who wrote the damn thing. Of course this would never happen, I know that. Duh. Just like Kurama could never act as psycho as he does in the next chapter. But that's what makes it all so damn funny, ne? REVIEW PLEASE and receive a giant Hiei plushie! ^_^_


	5. Kurama's Evil Plot

HIEI'S HYPNOSIS @_@  
  
Chapter 4: The Plot  
  
. . .  
  
AN: You waited this long so stop debating, I'm back and finally I've written the newest chapter! I didn't forget about this story. Honest!  
  
. . .  
  
It had been a few weeks after Hiei had gotten his revenge on them all. Kurama had been sitting at the desk in his room ever since he'd returned from school that day, trying to think up the perfect way to exact his revenge on the short fire demon. Of course, the first thing he thought of was to fight fire with fire, and hypnotize Hiei just like Hiei had hypnotized the rest of them...but just how to do this? Kurama was determined to think of something so clever that Hiei would never suspect a thing...a trap so devious that Hiei would easily fall into it, never knowing what hit him until it was too late! The possibilities of the humiliation Hiei would undoubtedly experience was enough to make Kurama cackle madly underneath the dim light of his desk lamp.  
  
He jotted down some more quick notes in the notebook he had labeled "Ideas For Hiei Torture." Indeed it would seem as though he was letting his Youko take over for the time being, but Kurama felt that whatever Hiei got, he most certainly deserved it. The embarrassment that he had suffered when Hiei had gotten revenge for the time Yusuke had hypnotized him was nearly unbearable. Every night for the past two weeks, the same clip of Kurama, Yusuke, and Kuwabara streaking in Tokyo had played on every local news station over and over again. Kurama felt that he could never live it down--nearly all of his classmates had seen the footage by now, and they all seemed to love teasing him about it...of course who wouldn't? After all, they finally had something on him!  
  
Kurama wrote down a few more ideas for Hiei Humiliation; he now had a list that had over a hundred ideas! And not only would it be Hiei who felt Kurama's wrath--Koenma, that little brat, he too would suffer the consequences of besmirching the kitsune as well! Kurama couldn't help but cackle some more.  
  
"Suuichi!" His mother called from the next room. "What are you doing in there? It's after eleven and you have school in the morning!"  
  
Kurama managed to stifle the smart remark that the Youko was about to make, and quickly closed the notebook. "Yes mother," he answered, and began to get ready for bed. Tomorrow he would make his dream of revenge a reality!  
  
. . .  
  
Kurama stepped out the door of his house the very next morning, mentally preparing for another day of squealing, swooning young ladies and mapping out in his mind exactly how he would plan to escape them all. He had managed to avoid being cornered by them so far...hopefully he could just keep this up. *sigh* Sometimes it was just so hard being beautiful! Shifting his backpack to his right shoulder, he strode gracefully as ever down the sidewalk. By his calm demeanor, you never would have guessed that he was harboring a plot of revenge beneath his emerald eyes. Today was the day! Kurama almost cracked and snickered in spite of himself. He would go and see that Koenma later on that afternoon, after he got out of school for the day. Having Koenma on his side was of utmost importance and would no doubt be the key to getting what he desired: revenge, duh.  
  
He was about a block away from his school when suddenly it happened. An ear-splitting screech pierced the morning air, the sound alone more terrifying than any demon Kurama had ever faced and he knew instantly what was to come...his eyes squeezed shut, he began to walk at an even quicker pace although he knew that his efforts were all quite futile. He counted down the seconds as the sound of high-heeled shoes slapping against the sidewalk behind him grew closer and closer, until...  
  
WHAM!  
  
"SHUICHI-KUN!!" A female voice shrieked into his poor ear, deafening him momentarily to any other sound. Two arms wrapped themselves around his neck and he felt a body land on his back as he struggled to breath, and almost lost his balance. "OHHHH MY PRECIOUS SHU-SHU I MISSED YOU SO MUCH!!"  
  
Kurama gasped for breath, wide-eyed, and desperately tried to pry her off of him. He was pretty sure that he didn't know this female, but then again he didn't know most of the ones who stalked him anyway. "Please..." he managed to choke out in the midst of being glomped to death. He feared that he wouldn't be able to hold the Youko back much longer if this kept up. After all he had been careless about holding him back during the past couple of days, what with all the plotting and careful planning he had been doing.  
  
However she didn't seem to notice his desperate request for freedom and instead of letting him go, her hold grew tighter. "HUGGLE HUGGLE!" She sang, and covered the back of his head with kisses. This did not please Kurama at all--he had taken special care to brush his long, crimson hair the exact right way that morning and this insolent female was ruining his look!  
  
"Please get off!" He told her again, putting more authority into his tone as his eyes narrowed dangerously. "I will not tolerate being suffocated."  
  
This time she picked up on the darker tone in Kurama's voice, and finally released her death grip on him. "Awwww, Shuichi-kun you're no fun at allllllll," she whined in a pathetic child-like voice that nearly made Kurama sick to his stomach. "I just wanted to catch you before all the other girls did so I could ask you...WILL YOU BE MY BOYFRIEND SHUICHI?!" She screamed into his face before he even had time to react. Kurama jumped and cringed at the extremely high pitch of her voice. He backed away from her slowly, fearing that she may have triggered a fangirl ambush by shrieking his name. Kami, they must have heard her screaming in the Makai! He could just hear Hiei laughing at him...grr, Hiei! That no-good fire demon, he was going to get what was coming to him and no amount of screaming, swooning fangirls was going to stop it!  
  
Instantly flared up in anger at the thought of Hiei and all the punishment he'd suffered due to his so-called "revenge" Kurama turned on his heel and immediately began stalking off to school, completely forgetting about--or perhaps simply ignoring--the rabid, confused fangirl who was still awaiting an answer from him. He would get through thistorturous day of school and then revenge would be HIS at last! ...Unfortunately the forgotten fangirl was not about to let this go.  
  
"Shuuuuuiiiiiiiiiichiiiiiiiii!" She whined, using a nasally tone and running to catch up to him. Kurama's left eye began to twitch; something that now seemed to be a natural reflex in response to all rabid fangirl actions.  
  
"Please leave me be," he told her sharply, not really caring whether or not he sounded rather cold. Honestly, they needed to learn to leave him alone! Some self-control was certainly in order for young women such as this one.  
  
Said young woman suddenly threw her arms into the air and began to screech, "EEEEEK!! I can't, Shuichi, I LOVE YOU!! I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU! EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!!"  
  
Kurama opened his mouth and was about to tell her to be silent when he began to hear it...it was faint, but his delicate ears could pick it up quite easily. His eyes grew wide. It was as he feared...THEY were coming! He would know those horrifying banshee shrieks anywhere. 'Oh Kami help me,' he thought to himself as he began to panic. From which direction would they be coming? Left? Or right? He didn't have time to ponder, he now had only minimal time to escape. He needed to get away before they attacked, and fast! They were dangerous enough on their own, but in packs they were downright deadly.  
  
Their cries were becoming even more clear to him now that they were coming closer. Battle cries, barely hinting at what they intended to do once they arrived at their destination--him. And then he heard them...  
  
"AHHHHH-YI-YI-YI-YI-YI-YI-YI-YI-YI-YI-YI-YI-Yiiiiiiiiiiii!!!!"  
  
Kurama wasn't going to wait around for the oncoming horde to catch up to him. Involuntarily letting out a gasp of terror, he took off running down the sidewalk faster than he knew he could, at a speed that would make Hiei proud...grr, Hiei! His anger at Hiei replaced his fear of the many sacks of raging hormones better known as "fangirls" who were no doubt hot on his tail by now, and gave him an extra boost of speed that propelled him the remainder of the way to school, where he could depend on the teachers to protect him from any offending females so long as he stayed indoors.  
  
. . .  
  
The end of the day did not come fast enough for the vengeful kitsune. The last few minutes of his seventh period class were painfully long. It was as if time itself had slowed down simply to put a damper on his day; a kink in his plan to gain revenge. But nothing short of the Apocalypse was going to stop Kurama. When he set his mind to do something, nothing could change it. He squirmed restlessly in his seat, something that he usually wouldn't do, but he just couldn't help it. The anticipation was nearly killing him! He began to doodle absentmindedly, trying to remove his thoughts from the sluggish, unforgiving minute hand of the clock, drawing a being that suspiciously resembled a certain vertically challenged fire demon...who was tied to a chair with numerous sticks of dynamite attached to his limbs and wearing an expression of pure terror. A thought bubble above this individual's head contained the word "meep!" in bold letters. Kurama began to snicker softly at the sight, and only then did he realize that he had doodled all over the front of his math book.  
  
Oops.  
  
Finally, just when he felt that he could take no more of this, the bell rang and signalled the end of the day. About a nanosecond after the wail of the bell pierced the air, Kurama was on his feet and shoving his schoolwork carelessly into his backpack. After all, such things were of no importance to him right now. He had to get out of there and fast, for two reasons: 1) The teachers could no longer provide him protection against rabid fangirls, and 2) He had to go see Koenma! His dream of revenge about to be realized, Kurama felt a devious smirk tug at the corner of his mouth as he sprinted out of the classroom, ignoring his teacher's pleas for him to slow down and the shrieking of his insane female fans. His legs carried him quickly yet gracefully down the hall, avoiding contact with any other students and managing to slide out the front door without running into any of them. He was free! Free at last! Kurama practically flew down the steps and continued running on down the sidewalk. He could hear Yusuke and Kuwabara yelling for him to wait, but no! Kurama had no time for idle banter, he was on a mission dammit!  
  
As he hurried along, Kurama noted to himself that he had done an outstanding job avoiding all of the fangirls thus far. Usually they managed to sneak up on him somehow, but since he'd made it out of the school in record time he doubted any of them had even seen him leave. He had not forgotten The Notebook that morning, either...no way in the Makai he could leave that behind! It was chock full of new ideas for hypnosis and ways to get even with Hiei...way better than those pathetic ideas the said demon had come up with and used on him and the rest of the Reikai Tantei. So it was in the midst of his race down the sidewalk, entirely consumed in his own thoughts, that he happened to smack right into the very person he had been meaning to go and see.  
  
"Oooff!" The teenage Koenma grunted as his rear hit the ground. Kurama stopped, snapping himself back to reality, and registered in his brain that he had just knocked over the one person that he needed to help him.  
  
Kurama bent to help Koenma to his feet. "Dear me, I must apologize," he said. "I wasn't quite looking where I was going..."  
  
Koenma's brown eyes gave him a look that was unreadable. You could never tell what the guy was thinking. "You should be more careful," he said as he dusted himself off and removed a few leaves from his hair. "What's gotten into you, anyway? You're acting very strange...but I think I know what this is about, which is why I've come to find you today." Kurama opened his mouth to reply, but Koenma didn't give him a chance. "It's revenge you want, isn't it? You want to get even with Hiei for humiliating you, am I correct?"  
  
Kurama nodded mutely, a bit surprised that the Prince of Hell would show up in the human world...but then again, he IS the Prince of Hell and he does what he pleases, unless his father has anything to say about it.  
  
"Well," Koenma continued. "I've decided that I'm going to help you out with this revenge. After all, when you're dealing with somebody like Hiei you're going to need all the help you can get."  
  
Kurama gave him a slight smile. "I would love to have your assistance, and I thank you. In fact..." Kurama's smile twisted slyly as he reached into his backpack and pulled out the notebook he had been adding new ideas to for the past few weeks. "I've been coming up with many different ways to make this revenge happen. Go ahead and look through it if you like. The list contains hundreds upon hundreds of ideas."  
  
Koenma's face dropped as he turned page after page...after page. "Man alive, Kurama, you're pretty obsessed about this aren't you?" A few loose pages fluttered out of the book and landed on the ground.   
  
Kurama snarled and quickly gathered them up again. "Be careful, I've taken special care to plan every idea!" He took the notebook back from Koenma and tucked the pages securely back into it. Then he realized what he had said and his face went pale. "Oh...please, you must forgive me. The Youko is quite restless as of late. It seems he wants revenge as much as I."  
  
Koenma gave him a slightly uneasy look. "You really worry me sometimes, Kurama. No matter--tonight we'll begin the mission to make Hiei pay for what he's done to you. Meet me in my office at seven o'clock and don't be late. I'll take care of everyone else." With a smirk, the spoiled prince disappeared, leaving Kurama standing there to wonder exactly how much Koenma enjoyed seeing them all suffer.  
  
. . .  
  
He wrung his hands nervously as he stood outside Koenma's office...pacing back and forth as a small bead of sweat made it's way down his forehead...he knew he was in huge trouble. Koenma sounded so angry when he'd called him here...what had he done this time? Terrible thoughts begun to fill his mind and Hiei began to quiver in fear...HA HA JUST KIDDING! *author laughs* Actually Hiei was leaned against the wall in a casual, yet "don't-fuck-with-me" manner, hands stuffed into his pockets and a bored look plastered onto his face (how DOES he do it?) as he waited to see what Koenma had interrupted his training session for. Hiei disliked being interrupted...this had better be good.  
  
A couple familiar loud voices filled the air a few minutes later, and Hiei barely lifted his head to acknowledge the individuals they belonged to. 'Hn, the oaf and the Spirit Detective,' he thought to himself.  
  
"...is not friggin' fair!" Yusuke was bitching to Kuwabara, "Every time I think I get a day off, the Toddler summons us back here for another stupid mission!"  
  
"Well if it's too tough for you I could always take your place!" Kuwabara told him, never missing an opportunity to tease the 'Great Urameshi'. He received a glare from Yusuke.  
  
"Your 'place' is lying face-down on the pavement!" Yusuke gave him a cocky laugh, but then was taken by surprise as Kuwabara pulled him into a tight headlock, grinding his fist into his slick, shiny black hair.  
  
"I'll show you who lies on the pavement!"  
  
Yusuke stomped on Kuwabara's foot, causing him to loosen his grip, and then straightened up. "Doofus, ya messed up my hair!" Grabbing Kuwabara by the collar of his blue school uniform, he pulled back a fist and was ready to punch Kuwabara when the door to Koenma's office opened, allowing them entrance to the room.  
  
Hiei pushed himself off the wall and went inside without a word, hands still in the pockets of his black cloak. Yusuke let go of Kuwabara and followed Hiei, anxious to see what kind of chore Koenma would stick him with this time. Kuwabara ran after the both of them, yelling at them to wait for him and threatening to beat Yusuke up after this was over (aww don't they have the cutest relationship? ^_^). Both teenagers failed to notice the one who had been watching them from the shadows...he began to laugh, softly at first, but then it grew louder and louder until it could practically shatter glass. His mouth was open so wide that pointy white fangs were visible, his once-calm emerald eyes now twitching madly at the prospect of what was to come. Finally, his moment had come! As his psychotic laughter died down, he clapped his hands twice, giggled with glee, and skipped off towards Koenma's office. Slowing down before he entered the room, of course, he took on his usual serene presence so that none of them would become suspicious. He took a deep breath to clear his mind once more, and stepped inside.  
  
Yusuke was spazzing out over something. Probably the fake mission that Koenma had whipped up just for this occasion. Kuwabara was patiently listening to what was being said, and...Kurama's eyes fell onto the anti-social member of the group standing in the corner. It was 'him'. Kurama did his best to keep his face from twisting into a vicious scowl as he gazed upon the bad-tempered fire demon. For many moons (LOL!!) Kurama had considered Hiei a friend, somebody he could trust...until he had decided to get his 'revenge' for his hypnosis. Revenge was just fine, of course. Who wouldn't want revenge? Thing is, if you're going to get your revenge on somebody, just get it on the person mainly responsible for the incident...which would have been Yusuke, of course. But did Hiei stop at the Spirit Detective? Oh, no, he just had to drag everyone into that mess didn't he? Well that was going to be his ultimate mistake! Streaking in Tokyo was something he just could not let go without proper retaliation. His mother had been horrified to see her perfect, beloved Shuichi running up and down the streets of the city in all his glory, naked as the day he was born. The only thing Kurama could pass it off as was a dare...that and temporary insanity, for he was much too ashamed to admit that somebody had gotten the best of him so easily.   
  
Shaking himself from his thoughts, Kurama realized he had been giving the inhabitants of the room a death glare that would give Hiei a run for his money. He immediately put on a faint smile. "Hello everyone, I do apologize for being a bit late. I had to run a few errands for mother at the last second."  
  
'That's right, put on that innocent little school-boy facade,' the Youko purred inside his head. Kurama frowned slightly at this, but was quick to shake it off before he started to get weird looks again. He gave them another smile. "Have I missed anything?"  
  
"Tch, no, just Koenma making my life a living hell," Yusuke replied in annoyance.  
  
'The boy has no idea of this "Hell" he speaks of,' commented the Youko once again.  
  
'Will you just hush up!' Kurama snapped back. 'This is MY revenge, butt out!' To this he got no reply, and assumed that the Youko was going to cooperate and leave him alone for the time being.  
  
"Yusuke this mission is very important!" Koenma chided him. "BOTAN! Where is that woman? OGRE!! GO FIND BOTAN, AND GET ME A LATTE ON THE DOUBLE, CHOP-CHOP!!"  
  
"Y-yes Koenma Sir," came the hasy reply of the blue ogre as he quickly followed his orders.j  
  
"Now then," Koenma continued, with a knowing glance at Kurama, "I've just told these three about their new mission. You must find this man, Bernardo Sanchez," he pointed to a picture on his big-screen television of a man wearing a suspiciously fake brown wig possessing strikingly green eyes. His moustache was slightly crooked on his face and he wore a very serious expression. He appeared to be dressed in a black business suit, giving the impression that he was indeed quite rich. "He is a very valuable asset to the Spirit World and I must speak with him as soon as possible."  
  
"Grr," Yusuke grumbled, "I'm a freakin' Spirit Detective, not your errand boy!"  
  
"Hn," Hiei grunted from the corner, uttering his first word since he had arrived there. "This is just a waste of time. I don't hunt down anything unless I aim to kill it."  
  
"Well you won't be killing Mr. Sanchez, Hiei. Unless you want to spend the rest of your life in jail, that is! And I'm sure that you'll be 'very' important for this mission..."  
  
Hiei cocked an eyebrow ever so slightly. "What do you mean by that?" He demanded.  
  
The smirk that was slowly forming on the prince's face was immediately wiped off. Kurama's eyes narrowed, angry that Koenma had almost given them away. "I mean you're great at finding people!" Koenma recovered. "With that third eye of yours and all..."  
  
Hiei scowled.  
  
Yusuke moaned, "I hate this! I want to kick ass, not go on some stupid search mission!"  
  
Koenma slammed a fist onto his desk. "THE PRINCE OF HELL HAS SPOKEN, NOW GO!" He screeched, gesturing wildly towards the door. "AND DON'T LET THE DOOR HIT YOUR ASS ON THE WAY OUT! AND OGRE WHERE THE HELL IS MY FUCKING LATTE!?!?"  
  
Hiei vanished from the room, looking none-too-pleased, while Kuwabara slowly inched out of the room. Yusuke stormed after them and could be heard muttering, "Damn, what's up HIS ass?"  
  
Kurama smirked in satisfaction and turned to glance at Koenma before leaving the room himself. "A perfect performance, I must say. But why must we include Yusuke and Kuwabara? My revenge was only intended for Hiei after all..."  
  
"Obviously. But why stop at Hiei when we can have much more fun?" Koenma's eyes glittered with excitement. "I'm going to get it all on tape and make many copies! I'll make a fortune selling them on E-Bay!"  
  
Kurama sighed. "Very well...I shall now go to prepare for Hiei's complete and total humiliation!" He cackled with delight and practically strutted out of the room while a catchy tune played inside his head, and so he sang along to the said tune: "Oh you can tell by the way I use my walk, I'm a ladies' man, no time to talk..."  
  
Koenma shook his head as he watched Kurama leave. This revenge thing had really gone to the kitsune's head!  
  
. . .  
  
AN: Hehehehehe...I made Kurama seem like a total psycho in this chapter...and it'll only get worse from this moment on. I've got some awesome hypnosis ideas, man as much as I lurve Hiei, he is going to get it BIG TIME. Anyway. Has anyone noticed how my writing skills evolved? Look at the first chapter! I think some hefty revising may be in order there... So lemme know whatcha think, foo'! If you've got any questions, comments, ideas, or hell I'd even take flames and death-threats (they're very entertaining! ^_^) REVIEW ME!  
  
I'll be writing the next chapter soon too. I've been using the time in between classes to get some writing done, when I prob'ly should be doing my homework instead ^^;; but that's just how much I lurve you all...did anyone buy that? LOL seriously though, reviewers, I cherish you all! *sparkly eyes* Okay, I'm finished acting like a freak...for NOW. 


End file.
